Claws For The Weekend:Two Beleaguered Wife Stories

City Jackdaw

On Thursday, my wife Jen came home from work early, ill. In the evening she was sat on the couch with a blanket over her. She said “I am weak, I feel like a blow up doll.”  I said “I feel like one too, but I’ve no idea where they sell them.” You should have seen the look on her face. I sometimes forget that she works in the funeral business, and can bury me for free. image   Then last night Jen, my seven year old daughter, and myself, were all watching the ‘eating bush tucker trial’ on I’m A Celebrity, Get Me Out Of Here. Poor Jimmy and Kendra had to munch their way through such fayre as bug cocktails, cow’s lips, pig’s eyes, pig’s nose, sheep testicles, ostrich feet, and live witchetty grubs. image   During the challenge, Kendra had to eat an antelope’s penis. One of the show’s…

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